“The man who taketh a steam bath
He loseth all the skin he hath
And, for he’s boiled a brilliant red,
Thinketh to cleanliness he’s wed,
Forgetting that his lungs he’s soiling
With dirty vapors of the boiling.”
Richard Gwow, quoted in Ambrose Bierce’s Devil’s Dictionary
I am the only person in my household who cleans bathrooms. In fact, based on a recent survey of the other residents of the house, I am the only one living here who even notices whether a bathroom is clean or not. Unfortunately, I share a bathroom with the dirtiest member of the family. Meet Marcus, a bundle of bad habits in a fluffy white package.
Meet Marcus’ bathtub ring.
When we got a small white puppy, it didn’t occur to us that we might be spending most of the next five years living in a construction zone. But that is exactly what happened. And Marcus has shown a deep love of rolling in dirt, knocking down garbage cans and eating the juicy stuff that spills out, and mess in all its forms, that makes him a very undesirable bathroom partner. After six years of intensive work, I’ve finally been able to get him to sit on commmand. But I don’t think he’s ever going to scour out the bathtub.